Those of you too young to remember the 80’s might be surprised to learn of the existence of something we referred to back then as “music.” This “music” was comprised of a synchronized mélange of fixed sound-wave frequencies known as “notes,” accompanied by less defined, more intermittent sounds known as “beats.” Often the “notes” were created care of human vocal chords – without the aid of computers — by a person known as a “singer.” The “singer” would marry these “notes” to an arrangement of words known as “lyrics,” and would, while accompanied by people known as “musicians” — who would generate complimentary sound-waves on devices known as “instruments” — perform these “music” compositions – or “songs” – before an audience of appreciative listeners, known as “fans.”

At the forefront of this long-forgotten technology was a man named Huey Lewis. Huey and his musical accompanists, aka “the News,” crafted catchy, entertaining pieces of ear-candy that were thankfully free of pretense, contrived angst, ironic detachment, verbatim references to music that was popular 20-years-prior, product placement, digital pitch correction, muddled politics, and overly emotional whining. He was, in a word, awesome.

And by “was awesome” I mean “IS awesome” — a fact your ears will no doubt verify after following this link to the Pineapple Express Soundtrack MySpace page.

For those of you who DO remember the 80’s, Huey’s dulcet baritone should instantly whisk you back to that happier time, that better time, when actual adults created music for people of all ages to enjoy, and this music was popular and appreciated by the masses. For the rest of you, on being exposed for the first time to this “music,” you’ll likely find yourself involuntarily performing an uncharacteristic act such as vacating your bowels all over your Panic at the Disco! CDs, or flushing your iPod down the toilet, or hunting down the Jonas Brothers, killing them in some dark alley, and eating their defiled corpses. Go with it. It’s a natural, beautiful thing. Welcome to the human race. But please, don’t thank me. Thank Huey.

In case you were wondering when Alexandre Aja – the French director responsible for the excellent Haute Tension and a surprisingly good remake of The Hills Have Eyes – would cash in his horror cred for a big fat bag of feces-smeared Hollywoood sell-out cash, the answer is… wait for it… wait for it… now.

I thought the point of red-band trailers was to fill them blood and guts and tits and foul language. This thing’s about as hardcore as my church’s haunted hay ride, only without the creepy “abortion doctors in hell” exhibit which at least makes the hay ride worth the ticket price. Burn you damned abortion doctors! That’s what you get for killing innocent zygotes! Anyway, Mirrors is probably a remake of some equally lame Thai or Korean horror schlock, because Hollywood studios aren’t even original enough to come up with their own unoriginal concepts anymore; Ironically, I believe they farm the work out to the same child-labor sweatshop that stitches together my Nikes, which are admittedly quite comfy. Because of this little air-pump thing right here. How do they do that? Amazing.

Mirrors opens August 15 against Tropic Thunder, which at least had a severed head in its red-band trailer.

Daniel Craig is ‘James Bond’ again and this looks like its one of the darkest 007 movies ever made.

I have to say that I am deeply intrigued….

Check it out:

Comedian Skyler Stone and friends from United Front put together this amusing video which looks at how Californians will be coping with California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger’s new “no cell-phone law while driving law.”

Essentially, the law states that after July 1, 2008 Californians must use a blue-tooth or a speaker phone on their cell if they are driving the car.

Pretty funny… Check it out