Forbes compiled this year’s list by looking at a “Web Celeb” as a person famous primarily for creating or appearing in Internet-based content, and for being highly recognizable to a Web-based audience. From the candidate list of 200 Web celebrities each candidate was ranked in five areas:
1. Web references as calculated by Google
2. traffic ranking of their home page as calculated by Alexa
3. Technorati rank of their primary Web site or blog
4. TV/radio mentions and press clips compiled from Factiva
5. bonus points if ‘Web Celeb’ regularly published their own videoblog or podcast
BOPsy’s 2007 Web Celebrity of the Year was formulated by the following scientific formula:
1. How many emails we got during the year from our friends that featured said online persona
2. The very nature of the content - funny, stupid, sick, perverse or really gross
If my Dilbert calendar speaks the truth, we’ve finally reached DECEMBER. No mere bullshit month like April or (SPIT!) September, December’s the month when friends and family get together to share laughs and good times, experiment sexually under the mistletoe, tip back some eggnog, light a few insurance fires, run the ethnic types out of town and make non-specific wintertime MERRY as it pleases ye pagan gods of olde and Jesus alike. It’s also the time of year when we at BOPsy headquarters roll up our sleeves, tie off with a length of rubber tubing and shoot a sweet fix of end-of-year pop culture nostalgia (cut with a little baby laxative and Dran-o, ‘natch), VH1 styley.
But for the moment let’s shift our attention AWAY from the world of cinema and the celebutarded skanks whose tales of “high” adventure normally fuel our editorial fires. Today I’d like to look at the world wide internet stars who, via the robot-age socio-technological phenomena of “viral video” (hey, it’s like Herpes!), found their way to our in-boxes… and into our hearts. I’ve selected six (well, technically seven) such iCons who — like Brian Atene and that adorable pixie Little Superstar in 2006 — managed to extend their Warhol-allotted 15 minutes of celebrity into… fuck… 16, maybe 17 minutes? Though they share our amour in equal parts, this is America, baby, and America’s about being # 1. So we leave it up to YOU, loyal BOPSy readers, to sort the boss from the dross and pick our 2007 Web Celeb of the Year.
This year’s nominees:
Shakes the Fuck-Bear
Entered the Zeitgeist: January 2007/again in December 2007
Pornography and bear hunting — both are wonderful in their own unique way. But who would’ve known these two great tastes would taste great together like chocolate and peanut butter, butt-sex and epilepsy, flare guns and PCP?
Well apparently someone did, as is evidenced in the internet video linked below (NSFW or NOT SAFE FOR WORK).
Don’t feel sorry for Shakes. Once a pitiful woodland creature whose meaningless days were spent foraging for grubs, whose destiny was to fall off a cliff or die of bear-AIDS like some old regular bear, Shakes — like Peter North’s prodigious money-shot or Ron Jeremy’s prodigious fat-fold cheese – is now the stuff of Pornography Legend. A fact which I’m sure makes all those stupid alive-bears greeeen with envy.
Rick Astley
Entered the Zeitgeist: March 2007
Though the British blue-eyed soulster’s “Never Gonna Give You Up” topped charts in 1988, earning him a Grammy nom and the distinction of being mistaken for a gay black man by the majority of casual listeners, we’d all assumed Rick’s career had taken the heroin highway to one-hit-wonder heaven along with Jesus Jones and the Fine Young Cannibals. Not so apparently, as Zombie Astley rose from the ashes of World of Warcraft’s message boards to become the ubiquitous pwnage known as the RICKROLL.
Tay Zonday
Entered the Zeitgeist: July 2007
Born Adam Nyerere Bahner, but given the name Tay Zonday by an old Indian chief after he slayed an entire village of Saquatches — armed only with a bag of Skittles and his enormous, uncircumsized cock –- this YouTube crooner rose to prominance via 4Chan and went on to seduce the nation with his new age nu-jack soul hit “Chocolate Rain.” Nevermind that he looks and sounds like a beige version of Our Gang’s Froggy or that he has some sort of partial-paralysis thing going on in the face; Zonday’s the real deal.
Chris Crocker (aka Leave Britney Alone Guy)
Entered the Zeitgeist: September 2007
After the botched abortion that was Britney Spears’ attempted comeback on the 2007 VMA’s, the obese abusive mom was met with near unanimous ridicule from those big meanies in the press and blog communities (read our commentary here). Yet one lone drag-queen had the COURAGE to stand up and say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. That drag-queen was Chris Crocker, whose “Leave Britney Alone” video-apostrophe ironically made him a bigger star than his baby-neglecting idol.
2 Girls 1 Cup
Entered the Zeitgeist: November 2007
36-year old Brazilian auteur Marco Fiorito had a dream. That dream was to bring scat porn and vomit porn together and thrust them into the mainstream with a film that was beautiful shot, edited and scored. Though he met resistance along the way, he kept going because, as the voices in his head would often tell him, “if you build it, they will cum.” And cum they did. 2 Girls 1 Cup deserves an Oscar for the score alone. But the real heroes of the film are the girls themselves (and to a lesser extent, the cup) who were willing sacrifice their last remaining vestiges of human dignity for the sake of art.
Internet video linked below (and in case you don’t know, extreme-NSFW)
When SNL-alums and Ron Burgundy creator-collaborators Adam McKay and Will Ferrell tricked a bunch of venture capitalists into giving them the money to start a website, they knew they’d have to kick it off with something decidedly “out of the box.” And so they gave us “The Landlord,” which turned McKay’s 2-year old daughter Pearl into a superstar overnight.
Because child abuse is only funny when it’s videotaped. Okay, that’s a lie, child abuse is ALWAYS funny, but it’s FUNNIEST when it’s videotaped.
Denzel Washington and Russell Crowe face off in American Gangster this weekend
OUR CRYSTAL BALLS SAY
1 American Gangster Universal $50M
2 Bee Movie Paramount/DreamWorks $35M
3 Saw IV LGF $13.5M
4 Dan in Real Life Disney $7.85M
5 The Game Plan Disney$3.5M
6 Martian Child New Line $3.1M
7 Michael Clayton Warner Bros. $2.85M
8 30 Days of Night Sony $2.8M
9 Tyler Perry’s Why Did I Get Married LGF $2.5M
10 Gone Baby Gone Miramax $2.25M
THE OTHER GUYS:
Box Office Prophets
1 Bee Movie Paramount/DreamWorks $39.4M
2 American Gangster Universal $30.1M
3 Saw IV LGF $13.5M
4 Dan in Real Life BV $8.3M
5 Martian Child New Line $5.4M
6 The Game Plan BV $4.2M
7 Michael Clayton Warner Bros. $3.4M
8 30 Days of Night Sony $3.2M
9 Gone Baby Gone Miramax $2.8M
10 Tyler Perry’s Why Did I Get Married LGF $2.5M
Box Office Guru
1 Bee Movie Paramount/DreamWorks $42M
2 American Gangster Universal $34M
3 Saw IV LGF $13M
4 Dan in Real Life Disney $7.5M
5 Martian Child New Line $6M
Fantasy Moguls
1 American Gangster Universal $48.75M
2 Bee Movie Paramount/DreamWorks $41M
3 Saw IV LGF $13.1M
4 Dan in Real Life BV $7.8M
5 The Game Plan BV $3.7M
6 Martian Child New Line $3.6M
7 Michael Clayton Warner Bros. $3.4M
8 30 Days of Night Sony $3.3M
9 Tyler Perry’s Why Did I Get Married LGF $2.75M
10 Gone Baby Gone Miramax $2.7M
SCREENS
1 Bee Movie 3,928
2 Saw IV 3,183
3 American Gangster 3,054
4 The Game Plan 2,844
5 30 Days of Night 2,627
6 Michael Clayton 2,107
7 Martian Child 2,020
8 Dan in Real Life 1,925
9 We Own the Night 1,634
10 The Comebacks 1,632
11 Gone Baby Gone 1,617
12 Tyler Perry’s Why Did I Get Married 1,403
13 Across the Universe 822
14 Into the Wild 660
15 The Heartbreak Kid 631
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