Annoying reality TV swine, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are now officially married.

“The Hills” stars got married in an early evening ceremony at the Westminster Presbyterian Church in Pasadena, Calif., on Saturday.

The 22 year old Montag, the 25 year old Pratt exchanged vows before about 200 guests, including Audrina Patridge and Frankie Delgado.

The bride wore jewels from Neil Lane, including a pear-shaped diamond floral necklace with multiple diamond chains layered over it, diamond earrings and diamond hairpins, which she picked out the day before the nuptials. Pratt borrowed a pair of diamond cufflinks from the jeweler for the big day.

People Magazine probably paid them a few hundred thousand dollars to get the exclusive photos and their children will probably be sponsored by AIG and Exxon.

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Country singer Jessica Simpson showed off her bigger body shape at the Radio 99.9 Kiss Country’s annual Chili Cookoff in Florida this Sunday.

Wearing mom-jeans and a tight black tank top as well as a leopard belt, the singer has shown that her once hot “Dukes of Hazzard” physique is long gone.

Perhaps Simpson eats the same diet that her boyfriend, Tony Romo of the Dallas Cowboys does? She admitted that she and Romo have “movie nights” and cook at home and order food in. Perhaps it might be smarter to stay in if she continues to look this way.

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The Madonna and Guy Ritchie dirty laundry is yet to fully air, but recent reports indicate that their marriage began to disintegrate when Madge planned the couple’s sex life in her around her gym sessions.

The regimented life of the 50-year-old Madonna apparently means that her bedroom time was planned for weeks in advance.

A source close to the couple told London paper The Mail:

“With her time being so precious to her, and with there being more important things to her like spending three of four hours in the gym every day, it become just another thing in the diary. In the last couple of years, it was all schemed into the diary. Guy of course felt this a tremendous turn-off to be at the same level of importance as, for example, her gym sessions and Kabbalah meetings. As a consequence, their sex life died more than a year ago. It is no exaggeration to say that they had not shared a bed in a year when the divorce was announced. And when the sex died for them, the marriage was doomed.”

Also coming out in the wash is that Madonna once questioned her film director husband with regard to who the leading lady he was casting in a project was. And when Ritchie asked about his wife’s relationship with Yankee Alex Rodriguez slugger, Madonna refused to discuss it with him.

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After 7½ of years of marriage, the couple of which have been filled with speculation from the outside that it would end in divorce, it appears that 40-year-old director Guy Ritchie and 50-year-old Madonna are finally divorcing.

The couple, which have three children: Lourdes, 12 (not Ritchie’s biologically), Rocco, 8 and David, 3 (adopted from Malawi in 2006) released a statement on Wednesday confirming the rumors that read:

“Madonna and Guy Ritchie have agreed to divorce after 7½ years of marriage, their representatives confirmed today. They have both requested that the media maintain respect for their family at this difficult time.”

According to reports, the marriage was doomed about three years ago on Madonna’s 47th birthday, when she fell off a horse and broke four ribs, her collarbone, her scapula and a knuckle in her left hand, and later called the accident “the most painful event of my life”.

A “family friend” said Madonna expected Guy Ritchie to drop everything to be by her side. Ritchie, though, “approached the whole thing in what [Madonna] called ‘a very British way’: instead of smothering her with sympathy, he said, ‘Come on, darling, you’re a tough bird – you’ll be back on the horse in no time;” the friend was quoted as saying.

Madonna was apparently so pissed off by her husband’s lack of sympathy that she told him their marriage was a mistake, and that he was not her “soul mate” after all.

If you believe the rumors, which some in the media do, it is clear that Madonna’s behavior had an emasculating effect on Ritchie. Combine that with the fact that Ritchie’s movies since the marriage were unsuccessful in some part because of her. “Swept Away” for example which starred Madonna as a spoiled socialite was ridiculed.

There is no doubt that Guy Ritchie, a ‘public-school’ (where rich people in England go to school as opposed to “state-school”) ‘geezer’ (British slang for cool dude) in all likelihood suffered from the image that being second fiddle to Madonna gave him.

So now, with Ritchie’s movie “RockNRolla” (starring Gerard Butler) releasing across North America on October 31st (currently the film is in limited release in select cities) and receiving very good reviews, and Madonna in the midst of her succesful world tour called “Sticky and Sweet” (she’s currently in Toronto and the tour ends December 21st in Sao Paulo, Brazil) there seems like no better time for the power-couple to split publicly.

So, naturally the question arises as to who will fare better in life after the marriage is dissolved. Did the up-and-coming London born director and is this the last and final curtain for the Kabbalah-loving Queen of Pop? Or will the time that Ritchie and Madonna spent together seem inconsequential for the the talented couple in the future as was the case when Madonna split from her first ex-husband Sean Penn?

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