As of Monday, the cheese will be back on email so email me at mizzjibbz@gmail.com for your daily does of chedda!

1. So Wesley Snipes’ tax evading @ss is going to jail for 3 years! Yea right, they’ll say that the cells are full and he’ll get out in 3 minutes.

2. Not sure if I believe this one, but Star Jones has recently been linked to Dwayne Wade!? Good Lord, why are men actually talking to this bobble head? She’s sooo E.T!

3. So I guess Pete Wentz is speaking his mind. He also told People mag that the ring he gave Ashlee wasn’t a conflict diamond either. (Does that mean it was a CZ?)

4. Speaking of diamonds, Carmen Electra’s engaged to Korn guitarist Rob Patterson. It was a black diamond actually.

5. Becki Newton…why’s your face as shiny as Bruce Willis’ head? Try putting some more makeup on. You’d think she’d pick SOMETHING up from being on “Ugly Betty.”

6. Kim Porter’s back w/ Diddy. Some people may call that loyal. Mizz Jibbz calls that money hungry. You know he’s a bi-s*xual bean wiggler…he may be bringing something more than just money when he comes home (if you know what I mean.) What kind of self-esteem do you have Kim? Didn’t anyone love you as a child!?

7. London police are investigating a claim involving Amy Winehouse. Apparently some 38 year old dude said that she head-butted him. That’s right, Amy Winehouse head-butted some 38 year old dude. Dude, you sound like a little b!tch, how bad could that be from a weak, drug-abusing frail woman like that? Then again, she was probably untouched after that head-butt. She’s got 4 lbs of hair as padding.

8. Ronald ‘Tinard’ Washington was sentenced to 17 years in prison (on April 22nd) for the murder of Jam Master Jay. Washington, who was actually a friend of JMJ, admitted that he played a role in the shooting. The person that actually pulled the trigger is still running loose. Can they find Tupac and Biggie’s killers now!?

9. Check out Mel B in one of her ads for Ultimo Lingerie Collection. She looks good in the outfit, but she looks more like she’s modeling for Sears. And really?? White?? We know that ship hath sailed!

10. Remember the female R&B group 702?? Well apparently one of their members, Orish Grinstead, died on Sunday of kidney failure. Sad :( She was only 27. RIP.

11. Kim… Reggie… smoke a bowl much lately?

12. Madonna’s new album “Hard Candy” will be premiering on Myspace soon. Madonna’s giving away free sh!t? We must be in a recession.

13. Claire Danes is the new face of Gucci jewelry. That works, I think Claire is boring and so is Gucci jewelry.

14. I thought this was a cute picture of Tony Parker and Eva Longoria .

Mz. Jibbz’ Picks:

So get this…Insurance companies are trying to make mastectomies an outpatient procedure as opposed to letting women recover in the hospital after having the very painful procedure. There’s a bill called the Breast Cancer Patient Protection Act that will require Insurance Companies to cover a minimum of 48-hour hospital stay for patients undergoing a mastectomy. It’s about eliminating the ‘drive-through mastectomy’ where women are forced to go home just a few hours after surgery, against the wishes of their doctor, still groggy from anesthesia and sometimes with drainage tubes still attached. Lifetime Television has put this bill on their Web page with a petition drive to show your support. Last year over half the House signed on. PLEASE!! Sign the petition by clicking on the Web site below.

http://www.lifetimetv.com/breastcancer/petition/signpetition.php

Thanks FS!

Happy Friday! ;)

1. Congrats to Megan Fox, she tops FHM S*xiest Woman in the World. Not a bad choice.

2. Britney Online Inc. owes over $23,000 in taxes from 2004. You better sell another car Brit; the IRS doesn’t play…just ask Wesley Snipes.

3. Alicia Keys had to cancel a few of her shows cause she’s been coming down w/ something. This news only comes a week after Jordin Sparks had to cancel her opening act for her cause she too was feeling under the weather. By the time they come to L.A they better be ready to perform cause I’m going to that concert!

4. JLo’s getting her own reality show on TLC. The show’s going to document her life as a mom, wife and career woman. I want to say we’ve seen that before but it’s JLo…I hate to admit it but I’d watch it! We know how marriages end once the couple’s done a reality show. Right Nick and Jess?

5. Naomi Campbell is going to be on “Ugly Betty.” As what, a b!tchy model? How original. Also Lucy Liu is joining the cast of “Dirty, Sexy, Money” since her time has freed up since “Cashmere Mafia.”

6. Kim Kardashian has decided to endorse Obama cause “I had dinner with him once, and he just seemed very firm about the change, and that’s, like, his motto.” Oh wow…is that what he, like, really wants to do? The best part is, she revealed this bit of info at the Girls Gone Wild party. How political of her.

7. You know how Gary Coleman and that bucktooth redhead recently came out saying they’ve been married for a while? Well yea, they’re getting divorced. Oh…and it’s going to be on the May 1st episode of “Divorce Court.” Wifey better have some serious insults for him cause if she can’t insult Gary Coleman, then she’s really stupid.

8. Amy Winehouse is so feminine and classy.

9. Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo show the world that they know how to make out. First of all, ew. Secondly…does anyone know what that blue sh!t is?

10. Too bad for Jessica Alba, she was only #2 on FHM’s list.

11. Ever since Eva Mendes has gotten out of rehab, she’s been looking like a mess. You can’t just wear a gown and expect yourself to look amazing, you need to do the hair too. The gown looks like party decoration anyway.

Mz. Jibbz’ Picks:

-People, if you don’t like my restaurant reviews, no need to b!tch about it just go and eat there. That doesn’t change my opinion, if I didn’t like the place then I didn’t like the place, deal w/ it and go to therapy for it cause your anger needs some management. Hint hint.

-Btw, some woman decided to show her flat @ss at Cameron Diaz’s dad’s funeral. Was she trying to be the life of the party? Rude!

1. Why’s Amy Winehouse wearing a gay man’s outfit? A mesh top?? Really? Did you get that out of Tom Cruise’s hidden closet?

2. Nicole Kidman is working w/ the U.N to help stop the violence against women around the world. I love it when actors use their talent and grace to do something good in the world.

3. David Beckham tells Ellen that him and Posh want a “big family”…looks like they’re going for that soccer team.

4. Apparently one of the main dude’s on “Gossip Girl” is gay and it’s supposed to come out soon. Hhhhmmm…if I watched the show then maybe I’d care.

5. “That’s So Raven” star Orlando Brown has been missing since yesterday. He left his manager’s house around 10:20am and no one has seen him since. Sad, I hope they find him.

6. Star Jones says, “Several years ago I made an error in judgment by inviting the media into the most intimate area of my life. A month ago I filed for divorce.” Oh stop yer wining…we all knew the dude was gay. He’s probably hookin’ up w/ the soon-to-be gay guy on “Gossip Girl.”

7. Congrats to Diddy, he’s getting a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. I wonder what it’s going to say…Diddy, Puff, Puff Daddy, Sean P Combs, Sean Combs, Diddy Combs, P Diddy, Attention Wh0re…just wondering.

8. Speaking of names, apparently Beyonce’s sister Solange is pulling a J-Lo and calling herself Sol-Angel on her next album. What’s even more interesting is that she actually thinks people are going to buy her album.

9. Eryka Badu says, “I’m such an organized person that it takes all the fun out of spontaneous s*x. It has to be organized the way I want: the clothes have to be folded up neatly, my own music has to be playing. It just adds to the whole show—it’s all about me, it’s my show.” Eryka…aren’t you single? Now I know why.

10. Ryan Seacrest got confirmation that Shannon Elizabeth and her dancing buddy Derek Hough make out. Who gives a sh!t. She needs to stop her crying and at least be a better actress if she’s going to subject us to watching her in the future.

11. Check out Mariah at her party at Mr. Chow’s. Glasses indoors?? Really?? That’s just annoying. And just once I’d like to see her wear an outfit not made for a 17-year old club-goin’ girl. I guess she just doesn’t believe in pants.

12. Victoria’s Secret model Alessandra is definitely pregnant. Check out the b00bz.

13. Cameron Diaz checked herself into a hospital to cope w/ the sudden death of her father. So sad :(

14. Looks like Tea Leoni’s not afraid to show her b00bz. I really don’t know how I feel about this. Does she look good? Aren’t they considered old and saggy boobz? Personally I’m not a fan of the freeballin’ b00bz unless they’re fake.

15. Check out Danica Patrick as a swimsuit chick on a fancy shmancy car. Not bad. Her body looks great; I can see some veins on her thighs though (or is that a bruise?) As for the face, she looks like she’s scared sh!tless. But I will say, congrats for being the first female to win the Indy race!

16. “Dancing w/ the Stars’” Cheryl Burke was caught making out w/ Gerard Butler at the Us Weekly party. Those “Dancing” girls sure do get around. She was just engaged to Matthew Lawrence.

17. Did Tom and Katie really spend $100,000 on Suri’s second birthday party? Ok, that’s it…I don’t care if he believes in goat cheese as a religion…he can adopt me.

18. Miss Jackson is launching a world tour on September 11th of this year. For international folk I can see how that’s no big deal, but are you seriously shaking your bon bon on the anniversary of an American tragedy? Miss Jackson…you nasty!

19. You know Emma Watson from Harry Potter? Well she was celebrating her 18th birthday and apparently she’s doing so but debuting her peach. Is it just me or does it look her peach is in jail?

20. I know some of you all think Kim is gorgeous and some of you just don’t…I happen to be one of the ones that do…check her out w/o makeup. As a female, I can tell you…some of us look hideous w/o the makeup.

21. Looks like Miley Cyrus isn’t really daddy’s little girl. Not that the pic is that crazy or anything, but really…no one needs to see your hot green watermelon bra when it’s basically kiddy p0rn cause she’s not 18. At least guys won’t go to jail for staring at Emma Watson’s cr0tch anymore.

22. If Jessica Simpson was recently hospitalized for a kidney infection…why’s she gettin’ so plastered?

23. I told you all last week that Kanye and his fiancee have parted ways and the word’s just getting out there now. Apparently it was due to his busy schedule. She still continued to say that he’s “one of the most talented people I’ve known.” What a way to dodge a bullet, that’s not a proper response to outing your breakup. Say something like “even though there was love, we have mutually decided to end it.” But instead she states the obvious? We know the dude’s talented. That’s like saying…Tom Cruise is gay…we already know that!

Mz. Jibbz’ Picks:
“Rock of Love’s” Daisy is so annoying. I’m so glad Heather beat her @ss. I love how she was upset w/ Bret cause he slept w/ her cause she was vulnerable. Dumb @ss…you opened the store; of course the customer’s gonna come right on in!

(NSFW)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ll2×4uyk_s

I ate at SBE’s new restaurant, “Izaka-ya by Katsu-ya” and let me tell you, it was so BLAH. I was dying to try their crispy rice w/ spicy tuna dish cause I heard it was “fabulous” but it was definitelyl “suck-u-lous.” And to top it off…there was a long hair on top of one of them! So we returned that dish, and they didn’t even bother to comp that dish OR our meal (that means bad service.) All the rolls were so boring, they all tasted the same and pretty much looked the same. The best thing was the yellowtail sashimi w/ jalapeno and the green beans. It was really crowded and I have no clue why. Not going back.
But if you care to try the suckyness, here’s the info:

Izaka-ya by Katsu-ya
8420 W Third St
Los Angeles, CA 90048
323.782.9536

1. No Ashlee Simpson didn’t get married over the weekend. People mag are saying it’s happening in May. I have no idea why everyone’s making such a big deal about it anyway, they’ll probably be divorced by her next album.

2. One of the Aston Martin’s used in the next James Bond flick was found in a lake in Northern Italy while being driven to the set. I’m not even that big of a car fan, but good Lord how stupid can they be!?

3. Sandra Bullock and husband are ok after getting in a car accident w/ some 64 year old drunk woman. Haven’t you ever heard of “Don’t Drink and Drive,” lady? They only say it in school about 4,000 times. Oh wait, she’s probably too old to remember that.

4. Enrique Iglesias said he’s tried repeatedly to convince girlfriend Anna Kournikova to marry him but she says no. Hmmm, I wonder why that is…you removed the mole from your face. Wait a minute, didn’t you admit that you need to use viagra? That may just be it.

5. Justin Timberlake and John Mayer were both at Cameron Diaz’s dad’s funeral. Awkward. Can you imagine all the guys you shtupped at your dad’s funeral? Wow, Paris Hilton would have 3 herds if that was the case.

6. Happy Birthday to Carmen Electra who just turned 36. Don’t worry, you don’t need to try so hard…we still think you’re kinda s*xy. But wait, is it just me, or do those suckers seem to increase w/ age?

7. Congrats to Tia Mowry, she got married to some dude.

8. CNN’s Richard Quest was arrested for possessing drugs in Central Park at 3:40am in the morning. Oh wait, it gets better…he had a s*x toy on him w/ a rope tied around his…uh…bean and there was some other guy there. I’m telling you, it’s not the tatooed freaks who wear make up that we have to worry about…it’s the suits! I’m surprise he didn’t use his tie, instead of a rope.

9. Christina Milian and her b00bz.

10. In case you care to see Ashlee’s ring. That looks tacky w/ the tat.

11. The same dude that artistically created Baby Suri’s poop and Britney giving birth (on all fours) has decided to do the same to Oprah as King Tut. If I was Oprah I’d be insulted, then again…her b00bz and bags really do look like that. (By bags I’m referring to the ones under her eyes.)

Mz. Jibbz’ Picks:

-Lindsay’s Dad on Lindsay (watch it if you have time.)

-Heidi Klum and her baby boy were at the Grove yesterday. She truly is hot s*x. I’m sure the rest of the fam was around but I didn’t see them.