Sweatpants-clad Spielberg stuffs wad of crinkled singles in Diablo’s G-string, says “now write my next script… with your boobs.”
Add “extending Diablo Coyote’s shelf-life by another 15 minutes” to the Schindler’s List of things we have Steven Spielberg to thank for – right there alongside Reese’s Pieces, nuclear-blast-resistant food-cooling systems, and that affable twerp Shia LaBeouf (pronounced: “shit in my mouth”).
Per entertainment industry trade publication internet website Variety, the aforementioned Dreamworker “tapped” the brass-pole-technician turned blogger turned memoirist turned Oscar-winning screenwriter to pen (or text-message, more likely) an as-of-yet-untitled comedy about a bunch of quirky dialog and pop culture references and stuff that vegan Starbucks baristas with little star tattoos on their necks will think is like, like, like, awesome, like like.
This will be the second unlikely pairing of the popcorn-movie king and the hipster pasty-shaker, as Ms. Coyote wrote the pilot and serves as EP for Spielberg’s upcoming Showtime series “The United States of Tara.” Details of the project are being kept under wraps, allegedly due to “Al Qaeda”, but I’m hoping it’ll be a sequel to Juno, only this time Juno gets an abortion, and the movie’s over in 10 minutes, before anyone gets the chance to sing.
In addition to trying to figure out what to do with all the money the industry keeps throwing at her (and I bet some truncated version of a Motley Crue song spins in her head each time they throw it), Diatsu Coozy is curating two weeks of stroke-inducingly obvious ironic hipster-cred 80’s pop culture references at L.A.’s New Beverly Cinema.
The “Mondo Diablo” festival (her words) started Sunday and will run through the 24th of July, and reads like the “employee recommendations” shelf at some Midwest college town’s local Blockbuster Video.
July 13-15 – Fantasy Night
LABYRINTH
XANADU
July 16-17 – Doc Night
GIMME SHELTER
GREY GARDENS
July 18-19 – Scary Night
NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET III
FRIGHT NIGHT
JULY 20-22 – Retro Night
MIDNIGHT MADNESS
WET HOT AMERICAN SUMMER
JULY 23-24 – Chick Night
DESPERATELY SEEKING SUSAN
PRETTY IN PINK
See you all on retro night! OMGLOL!!
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