Mizz Jibbz’ Daily Cheese: February 14, 2008
Happy Valentine’s Day to all - here’s gossip queen MIZZ JIBBZ bringing you the latest and the cheesiest cheese around….
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1. The hospital where Jenny Lopez wants to give birth to her litter, has been practicing a drill for not only when she gives birth, but also for a possible kidnapping of Lopez’ babies! I realize you’ve been wanting kids your whole life and all but good Lord lady, you missed one huge fact! No one likes your husband…who would kidnap anyone w/ those genes of his?
2. Why the hell is Kim Kardashian wearing that outfit?
That prairie look is so last year. Kim, you’re no longer Brandy’s stylist and no longer need to steal her credit cards. You’re (somewhat of) a bonafide celeb now, you don’t need do (or dress) like us common people. Was it laundry day or something?
MORE CHEESE AFTER THE BUMP
3. I’m not going to give you a play by play on Britney’s legal woes cause people are talking about it all over the place. But I will tell you that Star mag is saying that Brit Brit and Adnan Ghalib secretly got married when they were in Mexico. It was on the hush hush cause crazy Adnan is still married to some chick named Azlynn Berry. Azlynn?? Where her parents drunk when they named her? Seriously though, not sure if this marriage biznass is true but how dumb could Brit be!? Britney…you know you can’t keep a man…stop trying to pay them to stick around.
4. More on Britney…PETA has contacted her parents and urged them not to give their daughter any dairy. PETA claims that Britney’s love of ice cream could be affecting her bi-polar disorder. Let me get this straight…the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals is consulting Britney’s parents on the health of her daughter?? PETA…stick to what you do (which is bug the sh!t out of anyone who wears animals.) If PETA’s authorized to be Britney’s health consultants then Larry H. Parker might as well be her lawyer and Chuck E. Cheese might as well be her gym.
5. Speaking of animals, Paris has been accused of neglecting her cat (by animal, I was referring to the cat, not Paris.) The Kris Kelly Foundation has obtained Paris’ cat (named Prada - how original) and refuses to give her back. Paris left her cat at the vet two weeks ago and supposedly several calls have been made for Paris to pick her up but she hasn’t. I’m all for the love of animals but people…give it a break! If this is another “Ellen vs. the Pound” situation, I’m leaving L.A.
6. “Harry Potter” actress, Emma Watson (who’s 17) is supposedly dating Johnny Borrell (the dude from Razorlight, who’s 27.) Why the hell would a 27-year-old want to date a 17-year-old. Perhaps he wants to play w/ her Barbies too.
7. Hef asked Christina Aguilera to pose for Playb0y. Even though she was flattered, she turned it down. Apparently she thinks that’s “the old Christina.” Yea, you’re so right. We shouldn’t remember Christina like that anymore, after all, she is a mother. Let’s focus on her “classier” self. NSFW
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8. Someone asked Maneka Foster (Usher’s wife) if she was a Scientologist and she responded, “Honey, I can’t even spell it! No, I am not a Scientologist.” Good job on picking a winner there, Usher. Not only can she make a baby, but I’m sure she’ll be a great educator too. Maybe you should get Fergie to teach her how to spell.
9. Another perfect female for the men…Natalie Portman isn’t into marriages. Your stock just went up I’m sure.
10. Scarlett Johansson tells the world that her album (titled “Anywhere I Lay My Head”) is coming out in May. She worked on it w/ singer/songwriter Tom Waits. Scarlett, I think you’re a good actress (not a GREAT actress but a good actress), I don’t necessarily love you as a person (to say the least) but I’m going to go ahead and be nice and not slam your album…cause who knows…it could be a good one. But you’ve got to be kidding me w/ that title. There are SOOOOO many places in this world where you can lay your head (I’m not going to be dirty but use your imagination), why would you title it something like that!?
11. Speaking of laying your head, Lily Allen is showing the world what she can do (when she lays her head)…check out her talents
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12. Spencer why are you so wide-eyed? You look like you’re about to get some hot s*x @ss (and clearly the @ss you have, meaning Heidi, is not so hot s*x.) And Heidi, what the hell are you smiling about? Your lame @ss video tanked w/ a capital S for SUCK!
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13. Make sure to check out Kanye’s video for “Flashing Lights“…intense! (That girl’s @ss is so big, I thought she was Kim Kardashian for a minute.)
14. Dude…got milk? Her husband must be very proud.
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Mz. Jibbz’ Picks:
-To those that have inquired, I really don’t think Beyonce got a nose job. I’ve been dissecting her face and I still see the same face! I could be wrong…but if anyone knows nose jobs…trust me, it would be me. I’m no doctor but for now, I’m going to assume that she hasn’t changed her nose and it’s probably because she changed her hair that it makes her look so different.
-I’m very upset that one of my favorite shows, “Girlfriends,” is being cancelled! SUCKS!
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