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Pam Anderson apparently didn’t see JUNO

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Hepatitis-tinged size-queen Pam Anderson –- who was famous in the early 90’s for… jeesh, got me, I guess just having big cans — just made divorce proceedings a bit easier for her soon-to-be-ex temp-hubbie Rick Salomon. TMZ reports that Pam is “no longer pregnant,” which we can only assume means Pam rode the womb-Hoover to No Repercussions-ville and tossed the jellied remnants of their consumation into a back alley dumpster quicker than you can say RU-486.

Bravo, Pam. We think Hollywood’s younger generation could stand to learn a thing or two from this veteran of Hollywood reproductive irresponsibility. A baby isn’t just some Prada accessory that gets you on the cover of this week’s US Magazine. It’s like, an actual living HUMAN and shit. You need to take care of those things. For uh, like 18 fucking years! Do we really need drugged-addled walking eating disorders like Britney and Nicole Richie tainting the gene pool with their accursed offspring when, hey, last time I checked, ROE VS. WADE was still in full effect? Why ruin your bodies and careers for the sake of some Down Syndromey pants-wetter who’ll only speak to you in Mexican because that’s the native tongue of the undocumented nannies who actually raise your children while your snorting meth off some washed-up former rock star’s cock in the Republic men’s room? Fix those oopsies, girls!

Jamie Lynn? We’re looking at you.


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