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Remake Fever: Silver Horny For He-Man

He Man and the Masters of the Universe
“By the power of Gayskull!”

Though Michael Bay’s CGI Infinite Jest ‘splosion-fest TRANSFORMERS has yet to test its box-office mettle, Hollywood’s mining of 80’s toy franchises in lieu of “stories” and “ideas” has already kicked into hyper-drive. Joel Silver, producer of pretty much every good movie made between the years 1980 and 1992 — and YES I’m including the criminally underappreciated HUDSON HAWK and ADVENTURES OF FORD FAIRLANE on that distinguished list – is in negotiations with Mattel (makers of The WIZZZER™!) for the rights to HE-MAN AND THE MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE for the purpose of adapting it into a live-action feature (sans Dolph Lundgren, alas).

HE MAN redux will be a “gritty” take on the popular-yet-poorly-animated infomercial and shall be penned by Justin Marks. Marks is no stranger to the “Gen X nostalgia for a more innocent time purchased by nefarious uber-producer and adapted into big budget hyper-violent CGI spectacle” genre; his other credits include Mark Gordon’s upcoming VOLTRON remake and an upcoming STREET FIGHTER movie and of course David Goyer’s upcoming SUPER MAX (i.e. the Green Arrow prison-sex movie). Basically this guy’s attached to every nerd-centric adaptation known to man and yet his produced credits consist of… nothing. But he’s not a hack or anything. He probably drives a Prius and writes a blog. I just want to know who his agent is, so I can blow that guy.

HE-MAN AND/OR THE MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE will be co-produced by Neil Ellice. Silver lackey (and DB crony) Navid McIlhargey will exec for Silver and produce “in some capacity,” whatever that means.

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