Spiderman 3 Sets Box Office Records Worldwide!
Hung like a water-bison.
The rest of the world may hate us Americans because we invade their countries, steal their oil and drag their citizens off to our torture camps (or maybe it’s because we’re sexy cowboys and our family dining restaurants have generous servings for a reasonable price) but they sure do love our big dumb CGI-infested sequels. SPIDERMAN 3 -– the story of a boy, his dog, and their forbidden love –- is breaking worldwide box office records like they were made out of back-talking women’s jaws.
Web-slinger debuted in a dozen key territories Tuesday, smashing records across Asia and conquering Europe like an Austrian guy with a Charlie Chaplin moustache. Japan reports first day take of ¥415 million ($3.47 million), South Korea says 3.2 billion won ($3.44 million) and Hong Kong saw their biggest opening evar with $HK7.5 million ($958,984). The European territories will report their numbers later today, whenever they feel like it (because Europeans are lazy).
All this is causing a lot of wild speculation about what SPIDERMAN 3: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO WITH A VENGEANCE: THE WRECKONING: IN 3-D will do here in the only country that matters; the United States of America. Slate ( a web magazine that’s relevance was apparently a casualty of the Y2K virus?) speculates the aftermath of a big-time flop. Nay-saying schizo-talk we say, like the flat-Earthers, “Peak Oil” crazies and the “Global Warming is real” nuts. Still, it has inspired we editors of BOPSY to poll… and poll we must. What will opening weekend be like for SPIDERMAN 3? Will it rape and pillage like a horde of Vikings, or wither and die like a heterosexual man’s penis after seeing Kirsten Dunst’s monk-fish-like gaping maw? YOU DECIDE.
Current Poll
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- The World According to Garp (1982) as ‘Roberta Muldoon’ (37%)
- Harry and the Hendersons (1987) as ‘George Henderson’ (24%)
- Terms of Endearment (1983) as ‘Sam Burns’ (24%)
- Footloose (1984) as ‘Reverend Shaw Moore’ (14%)
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Tags: spiderman 3, box office, opening weekend, forecast, poll
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