Box Office Prophets

Fracture… $14.2M
Disturbia… $13.4M
Vacancy… $12.8M
Meet the Robinsons… $9.2M
Blades of Glory… $8.5M
Hot Fuzz … $7.3M
Perfect Stranger… $6.5M
In the Land of Women… $6.2M
Are We Done Yet?… $5.3M
Wild Hogs… $3.2M

Box Office Guru

Vacancy… $14M
Fracture… $12M
Disturbia… $12M
Blades of Glory… $9M
Meet the Robinsons… $9M
In the Land of Women… $8M
Hot Fuzz… $6M

Lee’s Movie Info

Disturbia… $12.6M
Vacancy… $12.5M
Fracture… $11.4M
Blades of Glory… $8.5M
Meet the Robinsons… $9.2M
Perfect Stranger… $6.1M
Are We Done Yet?… $5.5M
In the Land of Women… $4.9M
Hot Fuzz … $4.7M
300… $3.3M

Screens

Blades of Glory… 3,459 (-8)
Disturbia… 3,015 (+90)
Meet the Robinsons… 3,003 (-235)
Are We Done Yet?… 2,944 (+67)
Perfect Stranger… 2,661 (0)
Vacancy… 2,551
Fracture… 2,443
In the Land of Women… 2,155
Wild Hogs… 2,001 (-448)
Pathfinder… 1,756 (+36)
Firehouse Dog… 1,755 (-1,126)
300… 1,508 (-632)
Hot Fuzz… 825

WHAT’S IN THE CARDS

Hot Fuzz — Action spoof from the team that brought you the zombedy classic Shaun of the Dead. And by “spoof” we don’t mean that sub-idiotic non-funny crap that enemies of humor like Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer (Epic Movie, Date Movie) spew out like a couple of Down Syndrome kids who got into a box of chocolate Ex-Lax; we mean a well-written, hilarious ode to the genre by people who actually get IT. I hope Friedberg and Seltzer plan on seeing this movie so they can learn how it’s done. I also hope they get stabbed to death by hobos as they exit the theater. And I also hope the hobos take turns sodomizing their corpses, then eat the corpses, because cannibal necrophiliac rape-hobos are the future, my friends. They are THE FUTURE.

Fracture –- Courtroom thriller stars Sir Anthony Hopkins as a cuckold millionaire who shoots his whore of a wife (because she deserved it), then unravels a complex plan that will get him off scott-free. Despite the similarities this is not the O.J. Simpson story, but reviews are strong just the same, citing a tight script from writermen Daniel Pyne and Glenn Gers and excellent performances from Tony boy and Ryan Gosling. Flick was directed by Gregory Hoblit who treaded similar ground with Primal Fear.

Vacancy — Generally I stay clear of “nu-horror” movies; the ones put out by major studios with name-stars in the cast. I like my horror low-down and dirty, shot on 16mm short-ends left over from a Brazilian porn shoot, starring unknown actress/waitress/hookers fresh off the bus from Boise who ain’t afraid to take their damn clothes off, with buckets of fake blood and pig intestines and a total lack of cruddy CGI. It’s pretty much impossible to make a good horror film in the studio system, with the exception of serviceable horror-lite thrillers like Disturbia and this week’s new opener Vacancy. See, these films aren’t really meant for horror fans. They’re meant for suburban mall-kids and Gen-X soccer moms with dolphin tattoos on their ankles. For this audience they serve their purpose of being “spooky” without actually going into the territory of being “risky.” I won’t see it. I probably won’t even rent it. But if you’re a soccer mom with a dolphin tattoo on your ankle, take your teenage daughter to the mall multiplex then go get matching belly-button rings after or something. Then make out, because that would be hot.

In The Land Of Women — Maudlin melodrama from Larry Kasdan’s son. Every review I’ve read compares to Garden State, and remember how bad that sucked? Garden State was like being stuck in the pre-conscious mind of a New Jersey emo chick for two hours while she updated her MySpace blog before being gored to death by the unicorns that serve as the guardians of her psyche. Well never again, chuckles. Never again.

Tags: box office prediction, vacancy, distrurbia, hot fuzz, in the land of women, blades of glory, 300