Gears of War, Green Hornet Going Big Time

Dorks rejoice. New Line announced that they’ll be adapting the popular Xbox360 game Gears of War for the movie pictures. Gears plot is a bunch of videogame nonsense about giant steroid-addled freaks battling bugs from space or something. The cool part is the chainsaw bayonet on the end of the rifle. You can sneak up behind fuckers and saw them in half. I could saw fuckers in half with that chainsaw all day. Oh Lordie, what I wouldn’t give for a real-life chainsaw bayonet! The fun I could have. I’d head down the the 3rd Street Promenade and start sawing on some hobos! And no one would miss ‘em, because they’re hobos that’s why. New Line won an auction presided over by CAA’s dark uberlordes. Stuart Beattie (Collateral) will write the thing with Marty Bowen and Wyck Godfrey of Temple Hill producerizing.
In other cheesy cross-format adaptation news, Columbia has optioned rights to the 60’s TV show “Green Hornet.” Neal Moritz of Gridiron Gang, The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift and Click fame will be droppin’ madd producer-tronics on the shit. Because, you know, everybody cares about the Green Hornet. Everybody. All people are talking about these days. “Remember that show from the 60’s? It was on after Batman for like a season? Remember it? Oh, you don’t? Oh, you weren’t even born? AH-HA!”
Tags: Gears of War, Green Hornet
You should also check out:

3 Comments, Comment or Ping
martin o
those are som big ass gunz. and if im not mistaken (tell me if i am) they look like the brutes from halo…
just wiv fire and more blood and fire and stuff.
i want it now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mar 30th, 2007
geek
there are so many geeks out there – Green Hornet! Geeky. Freaky! Geeky-deeky.
Apr 2nd, 2007
geek
what the hell is Gears of War anyhow?
Apr 2nd, 2007
Reply to “Gears of War, Green Hornet Going Big Time”